ah this one is nice nice nice. i like the concept.

i like this one.

it establishes a sense for the relation between nothingness/absence/lack of something (/someone?) and geograhical distance, bringing inevitably with it the notion of time (inevitable since time and space are logically/physically connected). thus it makes the reader (=me ) aware of things most likely unthought of (is this grammatically correct ?). which is what good poetry could and should do.

i sense the concept of gas (=fuel), meant to transport vehicles and, ultimately, people, is being almost reversed by the last sentence, where no fuel is needed for nothing to happen, to proceed.
but by implying such a thought, something is going on anyways (at least and, at the same time most obvious, in the poem itself ), so there's this nice dialectic here which, apart from the physical implications i read into the poem, make me really like it and want to +fav it. so shall it be.

good work, sir or madam. keep it up, and have a nice day .

--
Don't let your dreamers grow up to be dead men. Drown us at birth, save her some time. - Every Time I Die, "Floater"

Good comment. I am overjoyed that you took the time to write this out for me. I speak english pretty poorly pretty often, so don't worry too much about responding with good grammar.

:-D Danke!

Ah, clever. And true--you wouldn't think a few missing blank spaces would be so noticeable, but they really are. You get a lot of mileage out of those missing spaces in this poem.

--
Critiquing someone's prose or poetry is an awesome thing to do.
The supremely awesome Mimesis 3 is available now!

3 sentances tell the story. A perfect dramatic arc in a poem of only 24 words.
This concept is strong enough to have made a much longer poem, and I probably would have. Still, your choice to keep it short and sweet makes an incredibly strong statement in this case. Sometimes less is more (a concept I am slowly learning).

--
“And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”
Sylvia Plath